Affirming and Encouraging our
children’s positive development
Imagine you are in a prayer circle at church or in a family
devotion and children are present. Not only do they sit quietly and
respectfully, they participate of their own will by offering sweet and innocent
and biblical prayers. If we are going to let the Gospel truly shape our efforts
in parenting and spiritual development we have to ask and answer an important
question: “how will we encourage this child?”
The reason we should be thoughtful about it is because our
answer may be the difference between drawing attention to the work of Christ in
them and their work for Christ. It is the difference between seeking justification by keeping the law of God rather than receiving his grace. Our children need to live in the hope that an almighty God works through needy people, not needy people work for an almighty God. God is not served by human hands as though he needed anything” (Acts 17:25).
God is pleased with us as we put our faith in Jesus and
claim our dependency upon his grace, not on our performance. Drawing attention
to our children’s performance rather than the work of Christ in them is another
example of what it looks like to parent out of the law. If this is the way we
encourage it may reduce Christianity and the church to a club, a club that they
are well accepted in so long as they behave a certain way. We don't want to do that.
So how does it look to parent out of the Gospel when it
comes to encouragement? Here is one example: “we are all sinners and sometimes
it is hard for us to trust God and ask him for help, isn’t it? We are so glad
that Jesus died on the cross to pay for our sins and help us to trust in him. I
can see that God is helping you to grow in trusting him.” This approach
highlights the work of Jesus to make it possible for us to pray. It keeps God
in his place as the helper and us in our place as those in need of his grace. This
response invites the child to rejoice in the work of God in them while it keeps
us from laying the burden of performance upon our children.
May we all have the grace that we need to highlight the
Gospel of Jesus, even in the positive signs of God’s work among the next
generation.
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