Parenting out of the Gospel, Part 2

Exposing our Law-Centered Tendencies in Parenting

Martin Luther said, “the law of God, although beneficial and beautiful, cannot advance us on our way to righteousness because we cannot obey it.” Yet, with children, it is exceptionally easy to reduce the Bible to a moralistic guidebook and wield its authority to impose behavioral standards upon them.

It is easy to take a story such as Jonah and conclude that you need to obey God or else “you too will get swallowed by huge fish.” Or how about David, the mighty warrior? “David was brave and fought Goliath, therefore you too should be brave, just like David.”

No doubt, obedience and trust are fruits that are reflected in Christians. However, those fruits will never be produced through ultimatums. Why not? It is because fruits are produced through the Spirit of God and not through the will of man. Indeed, this is an example of reducing the primary purpose of God’s word to a rule, a moral, a command, or a directive, which by the way, we cannot keep anyway. Of course, the Bible offers us rules for us to keep but our behavior is not the primary theme of the Bible. The primary theme, rather, is Jesus Christ and the work he has already done on our behalf.

Parents, this may seem like a small difference to you but I assure you, it is not. It is the difference between the true gospel and a “different gospel” (Galatians 1:6-9). It is the difference between leading our children to transformation or condemnation, between becoming a Christian or becoming a Pharisee.

Here are some questions to ask yourself about the climate of your parenting. “What percentage of your time is spent in declaring the rules and what percentage in reciting the story?” Or, “am I learning to direct [my child] to their need for Jesus and not their need to do good or to please me?” (Fitzpatrick, Thompson 29). These are excellent questions that can help us know if we are leading our children to conform their external behaviors to please people or if we are leading them to Jesus who has the power to transform their sinful hearts.